Once, almost every ten days I have this feeling that this life is not worth living. During such phases the heart and mind do not function rationally and I feel like hurting myself. I call it the ‘Van Gogh’ syndrome and wait for the inspiration (to hit me) which made him conjure the ‘Irises’.
It does not happen and I hate myself still more.
Then on the eleventh day I am normal.
I know how ordinary I am. I am the guy with the regular clean cut features, the guy with the steady job, the guy with a loving wife and kids, the guy with some money stashed away for the rainy day.
I give up my dream of ‘Irises’.
I draw a vase of Tulips and smile to myself. The Tulips look like roses but it does not matter any more.
After all you need to be mad and lonely to be Van Gogh.
Best regards,
Manoj
PS: Irises is a painting by the Dutch artist Vincent van Gogh. "Irises" was painted while Vincent van Gogh was living at the asylum at Saint Paul-de-Mausole in Saint-Rémy-de-Provence, France in the last year before his death in 1890.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
I am back once again
Hi,
Destiny seems to drag me back to this blog.
I am sure jaipur blogger has something great in store for me.
How else can you justify the existence even after the creator has not touched it for two years now.
My dear friend, I will now be more regular. In fact maybe if time permits I will visit every day.
A lot of things have happened since I last wrote. I have now become an author. This was a life time goal and I turned lucky. Not lucky in fact I should say extremely fortunate to be part of a book that has stories from wonderfully gifted writers.
I have adjusted to office life. My Boss is a lady who is good and human. Work in office is tough as the Global meltdown seems to have hit Kuwait the hardest.
I also MC ed a silver wedding anniversary of a friend and I am much in demand at party circuits. They say I have a sense of humor. It sounds funny.
Best regards,
Manoj
Destiny seems to drag me back to this blog.
I am sure jaipur blogger has something great in store for me.
How else can you justify the existence even after the creator has not touched it for two years now.
My dear friend, I will now be more regular. In fact maybe if time permits I will visit every day.
A lot of things have happened since I last wrote. I have now become an author. This was a life time goal and I turned lucky. Not lucky in fact I should say extremely fortunate to be part of a book that has stories from wonderfully gifted writers.
I have adjusted to office life. My Boss is a lady who is good and human. Work in office is tough as the Global meltdown seems to have hit Kuwait the hardest.
I also MC ed a silver wedding anniversary of a friend and I am much in demand at party circuits. They say I have a sense of humor. It sounds funny.
Best regards,
Manoj
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Hello
I am back.
When I last wrote on the blog i had thought that it would be the beginning of regular writing. But I was wrong. I did not write on the blog but I have done serious writing instead.
I have written four short stories and made my dearest friend Sanjoy read through all of them. For me his feedback has been very important and luckily for me he has not rubbished my effort. In fact I am pleasantly surprised as I did not expect the positive comments that came my way.
As usual I am fed up with the monotony of my job and had it not been for the writing and the cricket I play on Thursdays and Fridays, life would have been too tedious.
I am sure it is my job which the mess creator in chief as I don't see any problems outside the office. Funnily, people at the office have a very good opinion about my abilities.
My Boss is a good man. I emphathize with him as he too seems to be the right person at the wrong place.
Anyway most of us are struggling. Choices are limited and we have to make do with what is available.
I am back.
When I last wrote on the blog i had thought that it would be the beginning of regular writing. But I was wrong. I did not write on the blog but I have done serious writing instead.
I have written four short stories and made my dearest friend Sanjoy read through all of them. For me his feedback has been very important and luckily for me he has not rubbished my effort. In fact I am pleasantly surprised as I did not expect the positive comments that came my way.
As usual I am fed up with the monotony of my job and had it not been for the writing and the cricket I play on Thursdays and Fridays, life would have been too tedious.
I am sure it is my job which the mess creator in chief as I don't see any problems outside the office. Funnily, people at the office have a very good opinion about my abilities.
My Boss is a good man. I emphathize with him as he too seems to be the right person at the wrong place.
Anyway most of us are struggling. Choices are limited and we have to make do with what is available.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Hi I am Back
HELLO EVERYBODY,
FEELS GOOD TO BE BACK. THE YEAR PAST WAS A PERIOD OF CHANGE AND AT THAT MOMENT I WOULD HAVE NEVER THOUGHT THAT WHEN I RESTART I WILL DO IT FROM KUWAIT.
ANYWAY ALL GOOD THINGS NEED A START SO HERE I AM STARTING THE NEW BLOG IN A NEW AVTAR.
I HOPE MY FRIENDS WILL CONTRIBUTE.
IN ORDER TO MAKE CONTRIBUTIONS EASY I WILL CREATE AN ID WHICH WILL HELP YOU GET EASY ACCESS. HOWEVER PLEASE DO MAKE SURE THAT YOU PUT YOUR NAME BELOW YOUR COMMENT.
WAIT FOR MY NEXT POST
FEELS GOOD TO BE BACK. THE YEAR PAST WAS A PERIOD OF CHANGE AND AT THAT MOMENT I WOULD HAVE NEVER THOUGHT THAT WHEN I RESTART I WILL DO IT FROM KUWAIT.
ANYWAY ALL GOOD THINGS NEED A START SO HERE I AM STARTING THE NEW BLOG IN A NEW AVTAR.
I HOPE MY FRIENDS WILL CONTRIBUTE.
IN ORDER TO MAKE CONTRIBUTIONS EASY I WILL CREATE AN ID WHICH WILL HELP YOU GET EASY ACCESS. HOWEVER PLEASE DO MAKE SURE THAT YOU PUT YOUR NAME BELOW YOUR COMMENT.
WAIT FOR MY NEXT POST
Friday, January 06, 2006
Sanjoy sent this to me: Republished without permission
Breakfast at McDonald's .
Please read until the end.This is a good story and is true, please read it all the way throughuntil the end!
I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree.The last class I had to take was Sociology.The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called "Smile." The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions.I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway, so, I thought this would be a piece of cake, literally.
Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son and I went out to McDonald's one crisp March morning. It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son.We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then even my husband did.I did not move an inch... an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved. As I turned around I smelled a horrible "dirty body" smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men. As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was "smiling". His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God's Light as he searched for acceptance. He said, "Good day" as he counted the few coins he had been clutching.The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyedgentleman was his salvation. I held my tears as I stood there with them. The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted. He said, "Coffee is all Miss" because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm). Then I really felt it - the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes. That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action. I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray. I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosenas a resting spot. I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman's cold hand. He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, "Thank you." I leaned over, began to pat his hand and said, "I did not do this for you. God is here working through me to give you hope."I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son. When I sat down my husband smiled at me and said, "That is why God gave you to me, Honey, to give me hope."We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that onlybecause of the Grace that we had been given were we able to give.
We are not church goers, but we are believers.That day showed me the pure Light of God's sweet love. I returned to college, on the last evening of class, with this story in hand. I turned in "my project" and the instructor read it. Then she looked up at me and said, "Can I share this?"I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class. She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings and being part of God share this need to heal people and to be healed. In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald's, my husband,son, instructor, and every soul that shared the classroom on the lastnight I spent as a college student. I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn:"
Much love and compassion is sent to each and every person who may read this and learn how to LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS - NOT LOVE THINGS AND USE PEOPLE.
An Angel wrote: Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friendswill leave footprints in your heart.To handle yourself, use your head.To handle others, use your heart.
God Gives every bird it's food, but He does not throw it into its nest.
Breakfast at McDonald's .
Please read until the end.This is a good story and is true, please read it all the way throughuntil the end!
I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree.The last class I had to take was Sociology.The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called "Smile." The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions.I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway, so, I thought this would be a piece of cake, literally.
Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son and I went out to McDonald's one crisp March morning. It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son.We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then even my husband did.I did not move an inch... an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved. As I turned around I smelled a horrible "dirty body" smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men. As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was "smiling". His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God's Light as he searched for acceptance. He said, "Good day" as he counted the few coins he had been clutching.The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyedgentleman was his salvation. I held my tears as I stood there with them. The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted. He said, "Coffee is all Miss" because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm). Then I really felt it - the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes. That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action. I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray. I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosenas a resting spot. I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman's cold hand. He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, "Thank you." I leaned over, began to pat his hand and said, "I did not do this for you. God is here working through me to give you hope."I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son. When I sat down my husband smiled at me and said, "That is why God gave you to me, Honey, to give me hope."We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that onlybecause of the Grace that we had been given were we able to give.
We are not church goers, but we are believers.That day showed me the pure Light of God's sweet love. I returned to college, on the last evening of class, with this story in hand. I turned in "my project" and the instructor read it. Then she looked up at me and said, "Can I share this?"I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class. She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings and being part of God share this need to heal people and to be healed. In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald's, my husband,son, instructor, and every soul that shared the classroom on the lastnight I spent as a college student. I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn:"
Much love and compassion is sent to each and every person who may read this and learn how to LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS - NOT LOVE THINGS AND USE PEOPLE.
An Angel wrote: Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friendswill leave footprints in your heart.To handle yourself, use your head.To handle others, use your heart.
God Gives every bird it's food, but He does not throw it into its nest.
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